Behind the Bedroom Door

An accidental roommate

I love living by myself--the fact that things stay just where I leave 'em; the ability to savor silence if I want silence; dance wildly around the living room if I want to do that, or just putter--my favorite thing. But I get lonely too. I'm a social animal (more social than most) and I crave company. Another one of my favorite things is sharing coffee with someone in the morning, and it doesn't have to be a partner (though that's always nice). That's why I try to keep my apartment open to a steady stream of friends and overnight guests--I don't cook much but I do like to feed people, and having someone to chat with when I'm still sleepy feels luxurious and companionable--it makes the business of getting to work and leaving the womb of my colorful apartment less onerous. Right now, I have a temporary roommate--MP Dunleavey--one of the writers in Behind the Bedroom Door and a good friend, one who was present when the idea for the anthology was born, is staying at my place several times a months while she teaches a class about dealing with money issues; she is also starting a new blog on trying to live a happy financial life for SELF--check it out. I get regular girl time with one of my best buds (and free money advice), plus my morning coffee with a pal. What could be better?

(MP and I had an impromptu dinner party for two last night. A big salad and Saigon Grill take out. Yum.)

Ciao--

Paola

P.S. Don't forget to come out to listen to Behind the Bedroom Door contributors Anna Marrian and Pari Chang do excerpts at the saucy In the Flesh erotic reading series this Thursday night at 7 PM.

The perfect Valentine's gift for women--and men, too!

A very wise acquaintance of mine said that men who read Behind the Bedroom Door would end up "wiser lovers." Which is good for women, too. Besides, it's sexy, romantic, sometimes serious, sometimes sad, just like Valentine's Day in real life. It's not politically correct to like Valentine's Day and in fact I spent the majority of my life dreading it yet somehow hoping roses would magically appear on my desk from a secret admirer. So if I actually happen to have a date on actual Valentine's Day, I feel unreasonably excited. I guess this means there's a limit to my cynicism. Or maybe I'm just up for enjoying any excuse, even a Hallmark one, to celebrate and express love.

(I'm still a feminist!)

Ciao--

Paolita (as my friend, Sarah, calls me sometimes)

The happiest week (month? year? decade?) of my life: You decide.

I have never felt so bathed in the love and good wishes of friends, family, colleagues, students and btbd fans--truly, there is nothing like looking down on a sea of familiar faces, all of them smiling at you and sending good vibes. This string of book launch events--the SELF party, the B&N reading, the bash my sister and brother-in-law threw for me (anyone take pictures there?)--were joyful and joy filled for the following abreviated list of reasons. not in any particular order: 

1. Seeing my parents so happy
2. Seeing my nephews so excited
3. Being able to talk naturally and easily about sex (in front of an audience of 8 year olds and octagenarians and everything in between,)
4. Dressing up in different outfits and taking some time with my make up (I'm loving a black eyeliner gel that you apply with a little brush that I got at SELF)
5. Looking like a sexpert (!)
6. Having people respond, enthusiastically, to my book
7. Spending face-to-face time with amazing contributors and writers and great friends....

As we Jews like to say: What could be bad?

Ordinary moments of happiness

The transcendent stuff is nice, of course (that would be traveling for the first time, or new love and all the luscious, hormone-stirring emotions and impulses that come with it), but it's the everyday moments of happiness that make up a good life. Sitting on the couch with your feet in someone's lap, against warm flannel pajamas, getting comfort. Cooking dinner together. Dancing around the living room. Maybe that's actually the stuff that's transcendent.

I am going to Roma in T minus 10 or so days. Will it be under water?

Ciao--

Paola