Behind the Bedroom Door

Is it better to be formerly hot?

Or to have never been hot in the first place? Then, as you get older, you don't miss that former hotness!

Check out this much commented on piece by Behind the Bedroom contributor Stephanie Dolgoff and tell me what you think.

A cleansing experience

I'm not into fads, especially those that originate in Southern California, but I couldn't resist trying this one.

Mea culpa!

Spanx trauma

So, I've been hearing for years how great Spanx are--they hold you in, make you two sizes smaller, and aren't unduly uncomfortable. (I work at a woman's magazine--the subject comes up from time to time!) Anyway, for my big book launch week, I needed a bunch of knock-out dresses, which meant getting new bras and all the doo-dads one needs to go with them. I blame the very nice saleslady for introducing me to Spanx. Something called the Commando something or other model, which to me seems the very opposite of what Spanx aims to do (going bare versus covering up).

I tried the thing on when I got home, with trepidation. (It was a bugger to pull up, but yes, not unduly constricting.) Maybe that's because it felt like a mark of, well, middle age. But mostly it's that wearing Spanx has always seemed kind of like "cheating" to me somehow, as if we have to cover up the imperfections real bodies (many of them very sexy!) have. I liked to scoff that Spanx was just a modern version of the horrible looking girdle my (very) ample nana used to wear.

But now I was willing to put the stretchy thing on to see if it did work magic, especially since the dresses I would wear them under were definitely worthy of an accidental sexpert. And everything did look smoother--from the front. But when I turned to the side, that compression contraption had migrated my lovehandles up my back so that I had a bulge like Quasimoto. Back fat on steroids. So I tried another model, just the panties this time--and the same thing happened, except now the extra flesh was around my waist. If I knew anything about physics, I'd say there was some kind of displacement rule going on there. So I shoved the things in the back of my drawer and let it all hang out in good old fashioned control-top panty hose!

Ciao, belli--

Paula (that's me in red with a few of my fellow SELF editors at the launch party the magazine threw for Behind the Bedroom Door).