This may be incredibly unhip of me, but I've come to think that the whole FWB thing is way overrated; indeed, I might even say it's a way for guys to have sex with a whole bunch of people at one time while pretending you don't particularly care romantically for one above the other. In my (admittedly limited) experience, one party of a particular FWB unit usually harbors secret hopes and romantic feelings about the relationship; another thing that makes the arrangement a dud for me is this: the way my heart, body, and mind work, the physical and emotional usually go together: If I'm liking someone enough to be physically intimate, then you've got to believe that I'm growing fond of them too. If that wasn't happening, I would also be less interested in a physical relationship. In other words, it has to keep deepening to remain compelling, physically and emotionally. But maybe I'm a hopeless romantic. Or idealist.
Of course, I do believe in some kinds of friends with benefits. This week, my amica, Sarah, is visiting from Rome--we met when I lived in Trastevere for two months, while working on BTBD. She is a friend of a friend--now we're friends. So nice when that happens. In any case, she is an FWB: When I come to Rome, she graciously lets me stay in her gorgeous Trastevere apartment; when she comes here, mi casa e lei casa. That works well no matter what the economy is doing. Time to plan the next trip to Rome.
Ciao, belli--Paola
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